Guard your steps when you go to the house of God. Go near to listen rather than to offer the sacrifice of fools, who do not know what they do wrong.
Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God.
God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few. (Ecclesiastes 5:1-2)
I've held onto these words for about a week now, with adoration.
Since I've gotten mobile, there has been an endless list of to do's, frantic scurrying around, and anxiety creeping into my heart and mind and sleep.
My heart races, my head pounds, my soul wraps itself in preoccupation. And it's absurd.
I find myself running after life, with Jesus at my heels. The One I claim to adore so quickly becomes an afterthought, just another item to be checked off under the loads of laundry.
David once said (in Psalm 16:4), "The sorrows of those will increase who run after other gods."
I guess I can understand why. A deep, deserted unfulfillment steals the best of me when I fail to seek first my Love. Remnants are all I have left to give to those whom I love the most... Paul, Selah, Adden...
Today I needed to be reminded that
In repentence and rest is your salvation,
In quietness and trust is your strength...
These words are my healing salve, a pause from the frenzy, a reordering of priorities.
But the sentence ends in...
but you would have none of it. (30:15)
Jesus offers us life to the full. So much so that it makes us whole. And spills over onto everyone we know and even those that we don't. It's an ocean wave crashing into a sippy cup. There's no way to hold such goodness in.
I'm not sure if it's just me, but I often choose to "have none of it. " I would rather navigate my own way, run after every lesser cause, busy myself with the drone of my comforts, and hear myself talk and worry and harbor fears and complain and confide in everyone else but Him.
Still all that is not my God - within me. Quiet me.